Response Crafting

In work as in love

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At The New Job, I was assigned the task of “mentoring my mentor” – giving him advice, much like he is giving me, on the sort of things on which I may be more informed.

So, while he helps me become a manager, I am helping him get his lifestyle enough in order to find a significant other.

The task seemed straightforward enough. So I took some time on a flight to put together a PowerPoint (yes, a PowerPoint – we are professionals, after all) outling the steps he should take to find The One:

1. Map out your values… so that you can look for someone who shares them
2. Identify your strengths… so that you can emphasize them when you meet her.

Seems simple enough, right? I thought so.

When our Director of HR saw the 20-slide document I’d put together, however, she was amazed, quickly shooting off an email that read: “Wow – I love this! I feel like you’ve done this before!”

I replied that, although I had, in fact, never before played “match-maker,” the strategy in doing so was almost identical to the one I had researched, fine-tuned, and employed in finding the position I now held. (I got the job because I knew what I was looking for. And I knew what I was bringing to the table.)

(Her reply to this was, quite simply: “fascinating.”)

So, here’s the point:
Whether it’s your dream job or your soulmate, there are but a few high-level introspective exercises that will get you what you want.

1. What are your values?
2. What are your strengths?

The first will help you identify positions or people that share or complement your deepest desires.
The second will win them over.

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